A Short Conversation With My Cat

Me:
 Get the fuck off of me, I already fed you.

My cat;
I loves you, pet me asshole, where the fuck have you been?

Me;
 Yer spilling my beer, get the fuck off me.
My cat;
Fuck you dude, pet me now.

Me; Goddammit, get the fuck off me! Here, Let me light a cigarette, I know how much you like that shit.

My cat;
 Here have a set of claws right through your right nipple.

Me; Holy SHIT!!

My cat, don’t piss me off again, I’ll bite yer ass.

Me; Want some flying lessons?
My cat;,
Bring it bitch.
Me; OWWW! You little sonofabitch!!

My cat;
Fuck you asshole, where the hell have you been? My fucking shit box needs to be cleaned out, you think that petting me for an hour and a half is going to change that?
Here have some blood, it’s on the house.

Me; Oh, you little bitch, come back here.

My cat; fuck you asshole, while you were away, Rahm Emmanuel  decided to run for the Mayor of Chicago.
Me; How much does it cost to send an ungrateful rotten mother fucker too Chicago?
My cat; How the fuck should I know, bleed some more asshole and call the White House!

There will be beatings handed out around here as soon as I can find the fucking Peroxide and a one way ticket to Chicago’s Mayor office. If the little bitch lasts as long as the elections, God help who ever opens that fucking box.

Either way, it’s a win win. Daley is fucking gone, Emmanuel takes office and opens Pandora’s box into the corruption that has been going on there for the last thirty years and I get to read about whoever opened some fucking box and got to meet my cat.

Nice kitty.

A rat is a rat after all.
Someone needs to send a rat  chaser over there.

Fuck you Rahm.

Signed, a member of the Professional Left, asshole.
Good fucking riddance. Get the fuck out of the White House and go back to the little Rat Hole ya came from, dick head.

Sorry for your luck Drifty.

Get out of the way, secretary lady, cat treats have no effect, just dump the box off and run for your life.
Take the population of Chicago with ya.

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4 thoughts on “A Short Conversation With My Cat

  1. dood i was trying so hard not to laugh… and failed miserablythe good news is that rahm is currently poling 5th… which is dead last. i hope he is fucking humiliated by the voters.

  2. File this **** under "couldn't agree more."I don't care whether Rahm becomes Da Mair. Personally, I think he's forgotten that a lot of his theoretical support is in the suburbs; people who live in Skokie can't vote for the Mayor of Chicago. The important part is he's out of the White House. I liked that he did actually wait until September ended to get out. Good Riddance!

  3. I don't read Drifty no mo.He was grand long ago, but when he fucked up with Blue Gal on Mz. Hamsher, and progie's, I left him and his messaging.YOU, however, I still read.*G*

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