Change The Fucking Channel

I can not believe what the fuck is on television.
Cant. Fucking. Believe. It. .
I actually turned the sonofabitch on for the first time at night for the first time in a long time and was absolutely amazed at what passes for entertainment these days.

I was doing the Bustedus Domesticus thing, again, and washing some dishes.
The number one thing I hate.
So I’m in the “kitchenette’ and it’s pretty quiet, just some soft cursing and the clink of glassware and silverware, so I decide to turn on the Boob Tube for some noise.
Jesus Christ, no wonder half of this country can’t tie their own shoes!

I start my evening programming with Jane Mansfield’s sister whoring out her forty year dead sisters clothes from an old trunk.
Fascinating. Being the lecherous bastard I am though, I did stop scouring an especially nasty pan long enough to ogle the little blonde cutie they had modeling the musty old hippy clothes, what can I say?

Back to my misery, I next catch out of the corner of my eye some reformed fucking thief showing the masses how he managed to steal them blind and how to avoid some of that grief with some common fucking sense security measures.
I would be amazed if three morons out of the millions watching actually did one fucking thing he suggested to improve their chances of some dickhead just like him stealing them blind,
he probably made more money ripping people off.
Time to drain the shoe box sized sink for round two, I tune out the next fabulous topic. After I put two fucking plates and some silverware back in the “sink” to soak, I turn around to see the most ridiculous motherfucking thing even my twisted mind could come up with for a prime time television spot,
The Worlds Smartest Goldfish.

I shit you not.

Prime time television.
Yeah.
Lick my balls.

It’s no wonder I run into illiterate fucking morons day in and day out.

Bonus news!

Heroin Whore Amy Winehouse Punches A Fan!

Fuck. Me. .

The only thing I use this worthless box for is an alarm clock in the morning.
It wakes me up, I catch the weather and the traffic and turn the fucker off.
I’m thinking I would just as soon be surprised on both accounts and pitch this worthless piece of shit out the door before I start watching it and catch myself drooling in my beer.

Just for shits and giggles, does anyone in this country have a fucking clue that there is going to be a wave of bank failures and a world wide depression hit town in a couple of months?

No?
I thought not, Gladiator is on.

13 thoughts on “Change The Fucking Channel

  1. I laughed so hard cause you know it’s true. And a heads up there’s an upcoming actors strike so you know what that means… more reality shows. Maybe they’ll do a spinoff show like “Are you smarter than a goldfish?”
    Depression? Of course it’s coming unless they crank up the money presses and we have hyperinflation like prewar Germany.

  2. Mr. Natural, spend a couple of hours reading what that guy has been saying for months now.
    I just put up a link to a short piece, a snippet, if you will. Most of his posts are very long and chock full of reliable information and very insightful analysis!

  3. I dunno, I watched a few hours and change of great baseball last Saturday.
    First time since last season I WATCHED a game . .

    Lincecom pitched 7 stellar for the Gyro’s, k’d 11!!!!!!
    What stuff he has!! Up at 98mph REGULARLY!

    On the A’s side (it was part of interleague gaming) Duchscherer gives up 2 hits in 7, and LOSES!! His fast ball is as slow as Lincecum’s changeup!!

    GREAT baseball, Gyros 1, A’s 0.

    But the rest? Well, there ARE the cooking shows Saturday morning on PBS. Me, I LIKE to cook bein 20 years in the biz previously.

    I would reccommend, HEARTILY, Simply Ming! He’s AWESOME, and a real delight to watch and listen to . . .

  4. All I can get to work on mr. mortgage’s site is his youtube posts…I’ll have a look tomorrow…when I have time for more of the worst news ever heard. We have been spending like fucking SAILORS for two hundred years and I guess it’s all about to come due.

  5. Baseball’s on so seldom out here, I almost always miss it. If it weren’t for what’s on PBS and the weather reports they put on some subchannels, I probably wouldn’t bother turning the thing on.

    American Gladiator – we sure needed that one back on the air, didn’t we? Chicks are kinda cute, though.

  6. PBS, The Science Channel, and *head hanging in shame* HGTV are the only things I watch on the tube. Oh, and the local news and KO. Otherwise, its noise in the background and a light in that corner of the room.

  7. I sympathize.
    If you picked up one of those tiny weather radios, it might cut down on the stress of your morning wake-ups. I think they’re available in clock-radio versions.

  8. I just finished a first read at “theautomaticearth” blog. That is some seriously scary stuff. As financial writing goes, while long and involved, the author(s) don’t seem to have any particular ax to grind and try to call a spade a spade. If the results of current financial events turn out as stated, a whole bunch of folks will be surprised – and not pleasantly.
    I second busted’s suggestion to go read: http://theautomaticearth.blogspot.com/

  9. I ain’t turned on the boob toob in three years now. I hear that next time I turn it on, it won’t catch anything because it has rabbit ears rather than that new “high def” digital shit. To catch the morning weather, I go to the Weather Underground, where I can get *real time* information from a dozen personal weatherstations scattered around my very own neighborhood in addition to a forecast that’s ten times less annoying than some craptacular “weatherman” with a bad rug on his head excitedly waving his pointer all over a map projected on the wall. One bookmark on my menu bar, click it, voila, there we go. Same deal with news. One click, there we go…

    — Badtux the Tubeless Penguin

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